7 secrets of a healthy dating relationship

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In a sense, you can look at complaining and fighting in an intimate relationship as just ways of showing you care.Then, the question becomes: how do they talk about it? How they made it through and how they’re stronger because of what happened. Let’s round it up and learn why a relationship that lasts is the key to a happy life…Love is a challenge. We’d like a sure-thing that guarantees happiness and takes away all the pain. If you’ll excuse a superhero analogy, you need to stop trying to be Superman. Some couples talk about it almost like a sign from the gods that they shouldn’t be together. John Gottman at the University of Washington has amassed a persuasive body of evidence that meta-emotions are the real signal variable in terms of predicting whether or not a marriage will last. Or do you believe in holding it in and waiting for it to fizzle out? What Gottman has found is that people who have clashing meta-emotional styles, they have a really tough time dealing with conflict.Do you think happiness should be shared but anger should be suppressed? So smart people don’t ask, “How can I live forever? Even minor annoyances tend to become huge fights, because one partner wants to express and the other partner thinks you should hold it in and then all of a sudden it explodes.

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What myths about love are leading us astray and what do you have to do to have a loving relationship that stands the test of time? We’re going to see what the research says makes real relationships last so you can get as close to the fairy tale as possible. Time to find out the answer to that often-ignored second question…You want to find the perfect person. Meanwhile, a 2010 study of twenty-three thousand married couples found that the similarity of spouses accounted for less than 0.5 percent of spousal satisfaction.

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