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The cycle of the love affair with a married man almost always ends in broken hearts, hurt, and wasted time.

Sure you have those once in a million times where the man actually leaves his wife for another, but for the most part, it is a script for adultery disaster.

The other woman can’t call him or see him when she wants to.

Eventually those sneaky late night phone calls end abruptly with “I gotta go!

The ideal woman for this guy is the girl who has been hurt many times by single men and is in the stage where she just wants someone to love her.

If the man is not a total ass, he will feel the guilt every time he looks in his wife’s eyes, and he will try to ease the guilt by taking her out on a date, or suggesting a family vacation, etc.” and a click, leaving the other woman wondering all night if his cover was blown or not, and whether or not she will hear from him after that.She will get to the point where she must make a decision whether she would be able to deal with never being first in the man’s life, and the thought of it never progressing.* * * *A relationship will never flourish if built from the ground up on sneaking around, mistrust, and false hope.The other woman must think about herself and whether or not she will truly be happy with settling for being on the side. However, whether she settles for what he is giving her or not, nothing will fix the fact that he is not happy in his marriage and he will step out on his wife regardless. My dreams consist of love, laughter, and living life to its fullest.Finding someone to fill the void is much deeper than any feelings he has for the side chick. A lover of fine wine and food, I tend to break the bank of those who can handle me.

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Highly revered marriage researcher John Gottman writes in his book …many clinicians…have been quick to point out that ‘affairs involve sex, but sex is usually not the purpose of the affair’…In fact, most clinicians who have written in this area report that affairs are usually about seeking friendship, support, understanding, and validation…they are about getting the acceptance that is missing in the marriage.” My work with thousands of married couples in crisis indicates that this is exactly the case.

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